By: Undergraduate Applicant 47
Subject: Succesful University of Connecticut Applicant

Include an essay to help the Admissions office gain a more complete impression of you and what you can contribute to the University of Connecticut ...

As my application shows, I am an above average student in most areas. I have particularly excelled in mathematics, earning good grades throughout high school. When pondering about my future, I thought that I might be able to use math to be successful in business. So after my sophomore year, I decided to take some business courses with the goal of attaining a solid background in the field. High school, however, has not adequately prepared me to enter the world of business. This is the primary reason I am applying to the University of Connecticut: I hope to further expand my education in the field of business.

Outside of school, I have a wide variety of other interests. One of my favorite things to do is to play sports, especially baseball and basketball. Since I was about seven years old, I have played in many baseball and basketball leagues. While I join an intramural baseball league every spring, I play competitive basketball year-round. I play these sports not just to enjoy myself, but also to learn how to be a better leader. My leadership in basketball was formally acknowledged last year, as I received the sportsmanship award. This award meant a lot to me, especially since my team won the league championship that year. Not only did it show that everyone on the team recognized me for my leadership, but also it made me feel good knowing that I had helped lead a team to a championship trophy. This was my third year being on a championship basketball team, and I have also been on championship baseball teams, but winning the sportsmanship award was an added bonus.

Beyond my competitive sports, I have been skiing and playing golf recreationally since I was about eight years old. Every summer I take golf lessons to improve my abilities on the golf course. I also took ski lessons every winter for about five years until I felt I was skilled enough to compete on my own. During my sophomore year in high school, I went out for the high school ski team. I did pretty well during the season, although I might have done better had I taken a few more lessons earlier in my life. Unfortunately, that was my only year skiing for the team. This is because the next winter I started working at a grocery store, where I continue to work today. With limited free time, I had to choose between skiing and basketball. I chose basketball because I enjoy it more, and because its team nature allows me to develop my leadership abilities.

One of my most meaningful activities outside of school was a Jewish youth group called the B'nai Brith Youth Organization, BBYO. This was an opportunity to have fun and socialize with other Jewish youth. Getting together for group activities and taking trips out of state for weekend conventions was fun and educational.

In summary, my high school education and extracurricular activities have prepared me well for college. It is extremely important to me to receive a good education beyond high school. I am looking to learn more about business and how I can succeed in life using these skills. If I am accepted to the University of Connecticut, I plan to work hard to receive the best education I can -- and, of course, to enjoy my time there by joining clubs, organizations, and intramural sport programs.

For two more general undergraduate admissions essays please see Why take You?

By: Undergraduate Applicant 38
Subject: Successful University of California App

Talents, experiences, achievements, unique points of view - these qualities help determine whether or not applicants find success at college and whether or not they are ready to deal with the responsibility of independent living and the rigors of academia. Not surprisingly, these are the same requisite qualities needed to lead a successful life. I am certain that I possess these qualities and can meaningfully contribute to undergraduate student life at the University of California.

I owe my unique social experiences to my multicultural background. Born in the People’s Republic of China, I learned communism since the first day I went to school. Thus, when I left China for the United States at the age of thirteen, I felt overwhelmed. Not only did I need to learn a new language, I needed to learn a new philosophy, one completely at odds with my communist upbringing. However, my experience helped me realize the pros and cons of both communism and capitalism and how modern day capitalism evolved from absorbing the advantages of communism and socialism. The harsh US capitalism of the 1890’s would have led to revolution; capitalism continued only by melding with elements of socialism.

When I first came to the US, I attended eighth grade in a city near San Francisco. In the beginning, I had difficulty even understanding what the teacher was saying in class because I did not know or speak English at all. Consequently, I received relatively low grades with mostly “B’s” and “C’s” in my academic subjects. But I knew if I put extra effort into studying, eventually I would be able to overcome my language difficulties. I worked diligently throughout ninth and tenth grade, and I received straight A’s in all of my academic subjects in my junior year. My personal motto is: "Being intelligent will get you nowhere, but discipline, moral integrity and an excellent work ethic will bring you success."

During my high school years, I received various the Service Club in my junior year. As a Service Club member, I donated valuables and worked awards and participated in many extracurricular activities; I believe these activities will help me contribute to the undergraduate student body at the University of California. Currently a member of the National Honors Society, I am proud of this achievement not only because it validated my hard work, but also because it gave me a chance to help other students as well. Helping the homeless people in homeless shelters, I felt fulfilled by this experience because I had the opportunity to contribute back to the community some of the many benefits I have received. In addition to these nonacademic extracurriculars, I also joined the Math League and Science League to explore my natural aptitude for science and math and to determine how I ranked against other top students. In my junior year, I also received an award for my excellent achievements in Science League. However, my favorite sport is definitely soccer, and I have received two varsity letters as a soccer player.

While all of the above activities were important to me, I am most heavily interested in seemingly opposite hobbies: music and computers. I believe the most beautiful thing in the world is music, and I find solace in it. I can’t imagine myself living without music; it would be like losing my first love. Perhaps surprisingly, I also enjoy computer programming. Deeply attracted to the power of computer languages, I am fascinated by the fact that computer programming requires the combination of strict logic and creativity - two seemingly opposite qualities. English philosopher Herbert Spencer said: "The great aim of education is not knowledge, but action." This quote demonstrates the importance of applying education to social and working experiences. As an assistant manger for MDIT corporation, I made decisions affecting the other employees. If I do go into business after college, it will not be for the salary but for the opportunity to contribute to the economy.

During four years of high school, I not only enriched myself with academic knowledge, I also learned many social experiences which can’t be taught in school. Through my high school years, I became a more thoughtful person than I was before. Since childhood, I have dreamed of receiving a higher education at the University of California because it is a symbol of excellence. I truly believe I will succeed both academically and spiritually at the University of California.

By: Undergraduate Applicant 47
Subject: Succesful University of Connecticut Applicant

Include an essay to help the Admissions office gain a more complete impression of you and what you can contribute to the University of Connecticut ...

As my application shows, I am an above average student in most areas. I have particularly excelled in mathematics, earning good grades throughout high school. When pondering about my future, I thought that I might be able to use math to be successful in business. So after my sophomore year, I decided to take some business courses with the goal of attaining a solid background in the field. High school, however, has not adequately prepared me to enter the world of business. This is the primary reason I am applying to the University of Connecticut: I hope to further expand my education in the field of business.

Outside of school, I have a wide variety of other interests. One of my favorite things to do is to play sports, especially baseball and basketball. Since I was about seven years old, I have played in many baseball and basketball leagues. While I join an intramural baseball league every spring, I play competitive basketball year-round. I play these sports not just to enjoy myself, but also to learn how to be a better leader. My leadership in basketball was formally acknowledged last year, as I received the sportsmanship award. This award meant a lot to me, especially since my team won the league championship that year. Not only did it show that everyone on the team recognized me for my leadership, but also it made me feel good knowing that I had helped lead a team to a championship trophy. This was my third year being on a championship basketball team, and I have also been on championship baseball teams, but winning the sportsmanship award was an added bonus.

Beyond my competitive sports, I have been skiing and playing golf recreationally since I was about eight years old. Every summer I take golf lessons to improve my abilities on the golf course. I also took ski lessons every winter for about five years until I felt I was skilled enough to compete on my own. During my sophomore year in high school, I went out for the high school ski team. I did pretty well during the season, although I might have done better had I taken a few more lessons earlier in my life. Unfortunately, that was my only year skiing for the team. This is because the next winter I started working at a grocery store, where I continue to work today. With limited free time, I had to choose between skiing and basketball. I chose basketball because I enjoy it more, and because its team nature allows me to develop my leadership abilities.

One of my most meaningful activities outside of school was a Jewish youth group called the B'nai Brith Youth Organization, BBYO. This was an opportunity to have fun and socialize with other Jewish youth. Getting together for group activities and taking trips out of state for weekend conventions was fun and educational.

In summary, my high school education and extracurricular activities have prepared me well for college. It is extremely important to me to receive a good education beyond high school. I am looking to learn more about business and how I can succeed in life using these skills. If I am accepted to the University of Connecticut, I plan to work hard to receive the best education I can -- and, of course, to enjoy my time there by joining clubs, organizations, and intramural sport programs.

By: Undergraduate Applicant 38
Subject: Successful University of California App

Talents, experiences, achievements, unique points of view - these qualities help determine whether or not applicants find success at college and whether or not they are ready to deal with the responsibility of independent living and the rigors of academia. Not surprisingly, these are the same requisite qualities needed to lead a successful life. I am certain that I possess these qualities and can meaningfully contribute to undergraduate student life at the University of California.

I owe my unique social experiences to my multicultural background. Born in the People’s Republic of China, I learned communism since the first day I went to school. Thus, when I left China for the United States at the age of thirteen, I felt overwhelmed. Not only did I need to learn a new language, I needed to learn a new philosophy, one completely at odds with my communist upbringing. However, my experience helped me realize the pros and cons of both communism and capitalism and how modern day capitalism evolved from absorbing the advantages of communism and socialism. The harsh US capitalism of the 1890’s would have led to revolution; capitalism continued only by melding with elements of socialism.

When I first came to the US, I attended eighth grade in a city near San Francisco. In the beginning, I had difficulty even understanding what the teacher was saying in class because I did not know or speak English at all. Consequently, I received relatively low grades with mostly “B’s” and “C’s” in my academic subjects. But I knew if I put extra effort into studying, eventually I would be able to overcome my language difficulties. I worked diligently throughout ninth and tenth grade, and I received straight A’s in all of my academic subjects in my junior year. My personal motto is: "Being intelligent will get you nowhere, but discipline, moral integrity and an excellent work ethic will bring you success."

During my high school years, I received various the Service Club in my junior year. As a Service Club member, I donated valuables and worked awards and participated in many extracurricular activities; I believe these activities will help me contribute to the undergraduate student body at the University of California. Currently a member of the National Honors Society, I am proud of this achievement not only because it validated my hard work, but also because it gave me a chance to help other students as well. Helping the homeless people in homeless shelters, I felt fulfilled by this experience because I had the opportunity to contribute back to the community some of the many benefits I have received. In addition to these nonacademic extracurriculars, I also joined the Math League and Science League to explore my natural aptitude for science and math and to determine how I ranked against other top students. In my junior year, I also received an award for my excellent achievements in Science League. However, my favorite sport is definitely soccer, and I have received two varsity letters as a soccer player.

While all of the above activities were important to me, I am most heavily interested in seemingly opposite hobbies: music and computers. I believe the most beautiful thing in the world is music, and I find solace in it. I can’t imagine myself living without music; it would be like losing my first love. Perhaps surprisingly, I also enjoy computer programming. Deeply attracted to the power of computer languages, I am fascinated by the fact that computer programming requires the combination of strict logic and creativity - two seemingly opposite qualities. English philosopher Herbert Spencer said: "The great aim of education is not knowledge, but action." This quote demonstrates the importance of applying education to social and working experiences. As an assistant manger for MDIT corporation, I made decisions affecting the other employees. If I do go into business after college, it will not be for the salary but for the opportunity to contribute to the economy.

During four years of high school, I not only enriched myself with academic knowledge, I also learned many social experiences which can’t be taught in school. Through my high school years, I became a more thoughtful person than I was before. Since childhood, I have dreamed of receiving a higher education at the University of California because it is a symbol of excellence. I truly believe I will succeed both academically and spiritually at the University of California.

For two more general undergraduate admissions essays please see Why take You?